hello, Spiffy.

TUMBLR SUCKS BALLS.

2011-08-05T04:31:00.001-07:00

Sorry, i left you. I abandoned you & you were always right here... waiting for me.
Seriously sick of tumblr & of it's damned 'reblogging'.
Where the hell were the real heart-felt genuine posts. The ones you actually had to think a minute or two to make.
So yeah, I think I'm back. Not too sure.

On Independence Day.

2010-07-05T21:27:00.000-07:00

my younger brother Carlos, is going to become a chef.
If he can't finance it, I will .. some way some how.
This kid has been cooking for me since he was like 5. (He's turning 11 now )
Shouldn't i return the favor ?

Lets just enjoy ourselves.

2010-07-05T21:24:00.000-07:00

i love the summer,
i need to keep busy in order for me to function correctly
less than 4 hours a sleep a night
ive recently discovered 5 hour energy shots, lol.

2010-07-01T11:51:00.003-07:00

Agua - Fuego

2010-06-27T13:31:00.000-07:00

So i figured out my Storm.

I've been chilling with my sister a whole bunch.
She's pretty cool.
I have summer school man ..
FUCK IT
How is your summer so far?
Mine's pretty dandy.
Since when do dolls carry arm casts & glasses?
I need a Man, not a boyfriend.
My little sister and neice are too cool for school.

I baby sat these 2 little girls the other day , man were they characters. lol

Old Greg

2010-06-27T12:39:00.000-07:00

2010-06-26T07:16:00.001-07:00

Sorry for not posting reguarly,
My camera is retarded -________-

7 days until.

2010-06-09T14:05:00.000-07:00

So, maybe Providence isn't so bad after all.

It has cool people in it at least,

Like my the tea guy, & my wife :)

She is 5172010.

I passed my junior research exhibition today by the way :)

&yeah, this is where the magic (Blogging) happens.

written 6-7-10

2010-06-08T20:49:00.000-07:00

See love and lust are two different things,
and im glad im on the right path with you
see with you ive shared only the simplest of kisses-
the touches of innocence,
nothing more than adolesence.
id be lucky to fall into you arms this very night
since im cold, lonely and confused.
with tears of all 3 hanging from my lashes
i just want your heartbeat to match with mine..
and no one elses.

June 16th.

2010-06-06T13:51:00.000-07:00

Ok, so my birthday is coming up soon .. which i'm pretty darn excited for.

Idk why i'm so excited, but ive decided to make like a wish list for an awesome birthday sorta thing?

Yeah , here goes :

I really want balloons, especially since theyre AWESOME.

I mean, who doesn't like balloons?

& Some chocolate, preferably Reeses :)

I also would loveee Amerykah pt 2!

Self Explanatory?

Magic Tea Maker chicka WHAT ?

I've been wanting a new phone for months.

A letter, doesnt neccessarily have to be a love letter, but i love writing & i love reading .. so this would probably be the greatest gift anyone could ever give

& Then the fireworks would just compliment my whole day & i would be satisfied until next year !

-----

2010-06-06T08:46:00.001-07:00

Lunatique

2010-06-05T14:27:00.000-07:00

Getting ready for Gisselle's baby shower

Once you start, its so damned hard to stop.

Give me good music.

I've grown up since then ..

I'm still hard to follow, I'm just too free

----

I really like this picture.

Knocking On My Door!

2010-06-04T20:43:00.000-07:00

Hello, <3.

2010-06-04T19:20:00.001-07:00

2010-06-04T18:42:00.001-07:00

I'll give it to you.

2010-06-03T20:28:00.000-07:00

Hello again.
So I've been here & there.
It's 11:11 make a wish!
I've been debating whether i should come back to this for a long time. So I guess im here for a little longer.
La'Roux <33,
SAT's are Saturday.
I bowled today, came in 2nd place ..
psh, it's what ever.
My birthday day is coming!
VI.XVI.MCMXIII.
Have you guys ever heard of the Mozart Effect?
I will be testing it on my SAT scores.
Im also in choir as of today. AH

2010-06-03T20:05:00.000-07:00

how to be a monk

2010-06-03T20:01:00.000-07:00

2010-05-14T07:41:00.001-07:00

Jorge23 :)

2010-01-25T22:19:00.000-08:00

me & my nigga jorgeeee :)

it started by me saying : you could spell bag & yu still wouldnt b a g 8-)

Jorge23: (12:24:23 PM): Oooh u think u a beast
imcooel88:(12:24:37 PM): um , no . i Know im a beast
imcooel88:(12:24:38 PM): =]
Jorge23: (12:24:59 PM): Lol who sed dat.?
imcooel88: (12:25:08 PM): me :-)
Jorge23: (12:25:44 PM): Mhmm sure
imcooel88: (12:26:16 PM): its aight if you dont believe me you'll realize it soon enough lol
imcooel88: (12:26:20 PM): its gunna hit you watchhhh
imcooel88: (12:26:28 PM): likee a brick to yur face . lmao
Jorge23: (12:26:54 PM): I'm boutta rap
imcooel88: (12:27:10 PM): lol goooo

Jorge23: (12:29:34 PM): Yo jeni try 2 get me, b u worthless 2 me, I'm worth a millie u boutta penni hunny I'm tipsy of dis henny countn money cus I got plenty of dis green ud think ima vegiterian woooooooo

imcooel88: (12:31:21 PM): jorge say he rock louiee, but jorge aint shit . he can end up in a ditch by a clip of the 4-5th . jen dont play when it coes to her money , look hunny ya acting real funny. & nigga please if im worthless then ya even less. in the ground hell bound while im going round town spending ya DOE<$

Jorge23: (12:37:38 PM): Word.?? I'm less.?? Nucca u funny lookn sumthin like da 70s show Homeboy FEZZ.!! Nucca dnt test me son, cus ill run up on u wit da 9 let off 5 2 ya chest rip tru ya vest, u fuxkn wit a nucca from da west babygurl dnt get it twisted ima da fuxkn best u dun mest up now babe cus u fuxkn harder den an erection wen u lv. Dnt 4 get 2 mention my name, 1 of da greatest neva bk dwn cus I'm always ready cum n wit a stance like muhammad str8 up steady u dun .?? Dam I finished u already ahahahaha
Jorge23: (12:38:18 PM): Word live baby

imcooel88: (12:41:50 PM): fuck yu kid, ya mad cuz a girl raps better than yu .i been ready for you . please nigga ya jetting when yu see me coming thru . i got the bullet proof vest & i aint aiming for ya chest . im going straight for the face no delay once i spray. &oh i go harder than ya erections, cuz yaa rapping with mutherfucking pefection. i win elections no hesitation & yu on the floor like them muther fucking haitianss. yu aint ready for me. aim steady for me. cuz if i catch yu slippin its gunna be heaven for me. one hitta quitta nigga ill give yu fatality.
imcooel88: (12:42:32 PM): ima beast though for a girl , dont lieee :-)

Jorge23: (12:43:04 PM): Yea dat hatian part had me dyin lol
Jorge23: (12:52:05 PM): Yo yo real son u gona lay me out fam.,? Dam its b a god dam shame man, its murder beef y'all bring ya killas ill have y'all 6 ft unda da ground, family all n blk wit frowns man, ima king I deserve a crown man, I'm royalty, friend is loyal 2 me, we wlk wit 9s tucked at our waists man, n idgaf not scared 2 kill a bitxh ass nucca slippn, trippn, crippn ima lv y'all n cruches if not dead killa,

imcooel88: (12:55:53 PM): yeah nigga im a muther fucking killa , & best believe that ima mutherfucking Killa ya. its nuthing to a G like me. yu see once i shoot yu dead ima live happily. i dont care who else is around- they want it - them too will get shot down. yu aint King nigga ya a bitch yu better bow down . to the real fucking royalty cuz im back now. & i aint go no where so dont yu even try it - no tears no crying is gunna help yu out now. ya almost gone. ya barely breathing .. dique 6 feet under nigga please im still cheesinnn .
imcooel88: (12:56:20 PM): =]

Jorge23: (12:56:53 PM): N I'm not evn dun yet, I'm jus havin fun man, I gots tons of rhymes dat go 4 days I'm blown dwn on haze ill have boys kidnap u trapped n a cage, ima problem child I deseve 2 have a mic rappn spittn on stage, u b long n BK wrapn sandwhiches, wit all dem bitxhes I'm not spoiled I jus blong on fobes cus I'm da richest child, I'm fuxkn wild, I'm cute baby gurl look at dis smile :-D h gimmie dem digits n ima get da fone n dial, have u 2nite n da hotel ready 2 bone b4 dat ima need sum dome or ull bo n ya way home all alone gone

imcooel88: (12:59:39 PM): hun, please aint no dome over here. better go back to ya bitches yu know them dirty girls over there. & i dont cae if ya rick or poor - yu will still get slaughtered & ya muther fucking daughter. i can rap for days too , see hun this aint shit but a bitch. wasting my time like ya rhymes gunna do some thing. Keep ya digits babe - i dont need 'em plus i got 'em from ya brother hes the keeper. =]

Jorge23: (1:02:23 PM): Cheesin ya lucky u still breathin, u blong undaniethe me u worthless, I'm on top success defines me, ima young nucca gettn money u hatin ass groupie hunny, I'm stunnin u wana ge at a real man like me, ill jus make u myplayboy bunny ;) h sextape n videos u a fuxkn comedian yo, gettn at me bro joe.?? Dam u a rizzie hoe.?? U looked like a dime from head 2 toe 2 cum find out u gettn my bros digits homes.?? Its kool doe not sweatn it baby cus wit me ya chance was a mayb, u best belive wen I catch u my 9 won't b on safety cus boom bam bow ull b laid out

imcooel88: (1:05:58 PM): oh im a dime it aint hard to tell - but i still get down like a nigga & pop them mutherfucking shells. ya playa hating cuz ya bro got my digits- but maybe if yu was slacking or slipping yu coulda hit it. Rizzie dont define me hun im special. yu cant find me anywhere else its like i popped ya blood vessels. the ones in a dick cuz im making yu hard. but that wasnt my fault yu was staring so hard. & dont worry hun because im making my money &it aint by tricking or hoeing hunny. see i got class - something ya girls deff dont got. one shot POP POP hit 'em with the number one spot

Jorge23: (1:06:04 PM): How.?? Des hollow tips will crush ya bones, have medicals rush u 2 da emergency, have u get surgery cus nuthin will b da same n ite I'm da 1 2 blame, royalty, success, money n da fam is wat I'm bout, n now I drop ablums no fuxk droughts, n Ill rob n steal on u, let u no who I am jorge bank$ baby I'm real wavey text me n ill let dis uzi go crazy on u, srry 4 da few dat nu u, but ull b dead shot str8 2 da head laid out n bed enuff sed, I gets real pshyco n I'm goin off n I dnt need a mic yo, ima MC betta blieve me wen I say dis shxt cus dis no joke, ill go out ridin low smoking haze 2 da face ull b runnin like a rat n a maze

imcooel88: (1:06:39 PM): ugh im doneee .

imcooel88: (1:06:48 PM): yu win :-\

Jorge23: (1:07:57 PM): Lol :) h ima beast I can go 4 days jus pass me a dutch n sum haze n I'm off 2 a pen n paper, u quit baby gurl das it I finished u off aaaahhhhhooowwww.!!

lmaooo illl beeeeee BACKKK

I wanna get henna, & visit india

2010-01-05T10:42:00.000-08:00

2010-01-05T10:41:00.000-08:00

i named her lyll. =]

Just Me.

2010-01-04T17:24:00.000-08:00

idk , i feel like you guys haven't seen me in years lol

2010-01-04T17:20:00.001-08:00

2010-01-04T17:19:00.001-08:00

2010-01-03T20:21:00.001-08:00

2010-01-03T20:20:00.003-08:00

gemini's will do good this Yr.

2010-01-03T19:06:00.000-08:00

this is what betrayal looks like.

In God I Trust

2010-01-03T19:03:00.000-08:00

Recap.

2010-01-03T18:53:00.000-08:00

my friend luis left for virginia like yesterday :/
i just finished a 2week vacation,
im still single (no surprise)
ummm everything else is pretty much the same.
still have my Killa's
Killa's = My Group Of Friends.
we should have get a patent on this.
Killa's consist of Me, Isa, Annette,Stephanie,Monkay&Lexis. I wanna throw Bones & Lottey in there too lol.
um i think i am bipolar .
on account of my mood swings.
manic depressed w'e .
loss of appetite.
Of course i am not pregnant.
in order to get pregnant yu have to have sex.
Rules pregnancy out of the picture :)
um , i hide my blog from some people.
bad thing, yeah i just feel like some people aren't ready for All of me.
I just thro bits & peices as the days go by.
If by the time I'm done you aren't there..
what can i do.
lol

i wrote this earlier :
im not even the bad one.
dont Hand me the blame.
i wanna protect my heart
from all the hurt, & all this pain.
it happened once, i wont let it happen again
cuz its not equipt to handle this-
ripped apart by 2 men.

pretty much self explanatory. ive had 2 special people in my life, my whole life. thats it.
&theyre pretty much the reason why im such a bitch to men,
they make me want to be lesbian.
im paranoid & i think everyone is out to get me.

<3

2009-11-15T19:02:00.000-08:00

bloggers, i introduce my older sister :) (shes looks shit like me i know lmao)

2009-11-15T18:56:00.003-08:00

2009-11-15T18:56:00.001-08:00

2009-11-15T18:55:00.000-08:00

2009-11-15T18:47:00.001-08:00

2009-11-06T14:43:00.001-08:00

I like Arabic Letters.

2009-11-06T14:12:00.000-08:00

Nigga's broke my laptop. yo i'm tight. nigga's didnt even tell me . Thats straight up disrespect butttt anyways''

i've come to the sudden realization (not really that sudden) that im not hated for any particular reason beside i'm pretty. lol that was like proved today after school 8-)

My cousin is throwinng me a tattooo party - im aiming for 3 tattt's during this time .

that one is goinggg down from my neck to my back along w. other flowerss yay mee ^____^

2009-11-03T10:24:00.000-08:00

ive been in a Max B mood lately.
Last night was cookie Monsta's Bday . lol they look so much alike... :)

These are my friends

2009-10-27T13:25:00.000-07:00

i dont consider anyone else my friends except for stephanie FB, Shanelle AYC, & Starria S.

get over it .

Untitled #1

2009-10-22T17:59:00.000-07:00

BO$TON; :)

2009-10-22T17:55:00.000-07:00

Rip, Scooby

2009-10-20T20:07:00.000-07:00

nigga's almost hit my lil bro with a car.
My gma was outside sweeping the sidewalk.
& so the car missed my lil brother; cracking my dog's skull .. killing it.

wow, right?

My Brain,

2009-10-18T19:00:00.000-07:00

ohkie , so i restart & restart this post over because i have no clue exactly how i would like to say this.
yu know how yu do something & then yu regret it like not even 5 minutes later ..?
i do that type of thing alot .
theres alot of people in my life that ive regret meeting &stuff.. like because i know i shouldnt blame stuff on them ; i feel like they've altered my life in some negative way& i'd probably would have been much better off not knowing who they were.

Anyways i seemed to have been feeling that Alot.
& i dont wanna sound all secure & shit because i don't know where this is exaclty gunna go so i don't wanna get excited for nuthing & get my hopes up to be shot down..

But that feeling of total regret really went away lastnight .
like i took anxiety pills, listen to soothing music, wrote, thought & nuthing was helping At all before.
But uhm its gone now. & im dumb & young to say that just being with another human can take all that stress away .. but it did.

yesterday i was probably the most happiest ive been in a long time.
i feel special & loved. & the stress of constantly struggling & doing this & that, hw, & work, then gym, & being careful dont smoke, omg dont get drunk .. dont have sex hes not your man .. Yur big brother is calling, yur mom wants this & that from yu she wants money too but your job doesnt give enough to satisfy her & yur managers yellll at yu so much yu wanna just quit & walk out but were in a recession & if i lose this job im not getting another until a really long time & i dont have that luxery to just quit & wait .

Thats how my mind runs daily you see.
That was all gone . I was set free.
I'm attracted spiritually emotionally mentally & physically.
Clears my mind, your my drug.
i'd be find in this world if i had nuthing but your love.

i dunno but i was explaining to gabie how i felt & i feel like the most beautiful girl next to him. I feel like im special & im soooooo fucking lucky to have found someone that really cares, thats so passionate towrds me with everything he does. Handles me with much care. Takes my hand , promises never to let go & you haven't for since i knew you we've always been like this...
oh my fucking god this is how love feels.
i knew it ! i knew yu were the one since the moment i met you ..
i just want yu to kiss my forehead & promise me that were gunna be together someday .. someday till forever.

Via Library

2009-10-16T10:03:00.000-07:00

i like ro read my horoscope everyday.
liz calls 'em "horrible"scopes ..
theyre always like really FUCKING accurate.

soposedly i keep people away .. bunch a bullshit -_-

Shanella says hi :)

you swear,

2009-10-01T10:16:00.000-07:00

we didn't make love baby,
That was pure HATE.

LIES

2009-09-29T10:00:00.000-07:00

Lies, from everything that youve said to everything youve done. Lies
From the empty kisses pursing our lips to the shoves onto the bed, telling me that you love me & this is how love feels & that you are as good as its going to get. Lies
Im, dumb, its hard to admit, but guess what?
youre dumber.
Youre nothing, never be something, never anything; you peice of shit under your wings its dso hard for me to sing anything ! ... its been stoppped tingling
because youre nothing but bud, blood, & Lies.
Allowed into a place when you had nothing.. given you shelter, food & love when you had none ..
You dare to Steal, Cheat, & You dare telll Lies?
Biting the beautiful but gullable hand that had so gladly fed you for your past life.
Thinking that youre a step ahead but we're now 5 steps evern farther.. & you'll never be a good Father because everything youve told your child was a pack of Lies!
I hate you, but i love you.
Hate you for making me cry, for telling me those lies, for making me feel like i wanted to die .. in silence with no one around me.
For making me feel like My life had no value.
But sir, I love you as well..
For now i have learned my lesson, expirienced this, now i can reminisce on our first kiss, & ill never be as stupid as this .. Ever again.
I hate you but i love you .
thankyou, to all of your lies.

Lost One.

2009-09-26T14:42:00.000-07:00

havent been around in a long time & when i come back i act like everything was aight. lol
ive been uber busy with school work & such . tryna pass this year i fucked up enough to last me this & last yr.
So no games.
i dont bunk ,
i study ,
i do my home work ,
i work after school,
im in brother hood
& ive been tryna sing as much as possible.
I'm doing me.
No boys or girls in my life.
With my same circle, Isa, Steph, Gabie, Shanelle & Janelle. No more new faces.
No love - too busy for that shit ..
ive realized, & am still realizing alot of shit its like im looking for myself still..
& blogging wasnt part of the plan at the timeee ; but i'll keep everyone updating here & there.

but you'd look at me & think nothing is wrong . Like the right light is peering thru my pores. That my smile is how i actually feel. i guess you can say im a snake.

mami.

2009-09-26T14:30:00.000-07:00

she so looks like a white girl. shes 40 , lmao.
that is my mother, my father, & my friend :)
she takes the clothes off her back to put some on mine. shes one of the most sweetest people you'll ever meet in your life. im blessed to been have given such a wonderful person.

<333333 ,

welcome back

2009-09-07T15:54:00.001-07:00

hello school, good-bye summer.
i like the Phoenix , they sound cool.
i love my room.
the most monotonous classes were given to me,
exception to english class, mr, elliott should quit & become a comedian -_-
love like a sunset.
everything looks better in french
i wish my name was more elegant.
like Alexandria, or something. lol
paola will do till then i supppose

i need a new music device so i can listen to weird shit.

im still bad though :)

who knew.

2009-09-07T15:45:00.000-07:00

its like we hate eachother, so the sex must be crazy.

I'm Sorry.

2009-08-12T12:24:00.000-07:00

i wish i was what everyone thinks i am
i wish i didnt cry tears, or feel painn . it'd be much easier that way
im a wreck man, i fooled you's. all of you's . i fooled yous good too
made you believe i was strong, & that i could get passed everything & that everything is just fine. that i was strong & that you could come to me & expect not to hear me in return.
that i live my life to the fullest with no worries & no regrets..

im sorry
everything was false.
i sit down in the tub & let the shower head pour down on me, so it can feel like its raining & i can just cry everything out.
i dont know what else to do.
im going crazy man .
i have nothing to offer, ive put it all out there. everyone took a big ass part of me & now .. im nothing.
who really has nervous breakdowns, c;mon now really?

im sorry that i can be what everyone expects of ,e.
im sorry i drink i smoke i have premarital sex i lie cheat & steal.
im sorry i couldnt be the superhero & this post wont cheer anyone up.
im just ...
im sorry.

but at least now you's know the truth .

sk note.

2009-08-08T13:06:00.001-07:00

hi , postin agggain .
so tell me one niht i was in new york , it was really late into the night & i just kept thinkinggg..
i always thougght if i was left alone for a longg enoughhh time , i would think myself to death .
& thats not far from trueee ,, but yeah lemme gett backk to what i meant to posst.

soo , i write in my notes ; (mant do not know this but my notes is prlly the most secretive place in my phone. i hateeee hate hate when people touch my phone .. they usually never do ; but if they do i always make sure they forget the notes :)

so this was in it , imma copy it word for word even the mistakes? it feels more originall that way :p

so theres this guy ...
i'm startin to really like him ya kno?
he's sweet . hes honest , he's carin.
i like him more for his intelligence than physical traits
not saying hes not beautiful .. that he is.
in every way imaginable
from his sad brown eyes , to his smile.. his modest abilities to make me collapse simply listenin to the random thoughts thats come out his lipss..
i once thought i wouldnt love again, i swore it was the wrong thing to do . & i simply dwelled on my past because i felt closer to you that way . i reminisced on the things we used to do because the memories were so vivid that it felt like it wasnt so long ago that the memory was made. like if it was only yesterday that you were here, & i was happy... but i'm young. & that was very naive of me
as of august 3rd. 2009 @ 3:14 am. i believe i can.
idk why all of this coming so out of no where ya kno?
i get really attracted to the people who take time to listen though ..
the one's who show me love are the one's who always get love back.
i know i'm just rambling but it feels nice ; to acknowledge that there is hope, lol if you will
that i will recover from my broken heart
recover from crying into the late nights until early mournings.
not even hope. because hope is when you don't know.
i know- that my relationship with this person will be nothing less than healthy .
i have this weird feeling- liking this person i'm not going to have many of those 'crying into late night' nights..
lol just a feeling though

i'll stop now, though. because girls do this weird thing when they like a boy . they make up one thousand &one intricate scenario's about how their life would turn out once their relationship took off.
that ets out of hand you see, because then the females feel as if maybe some of it has happened, then their feelingd grow stonger &deeper &yet t he boy has no idea , because he has simply no interest in how far we went iinto the future . . .
but yeah good nite*
um ..
i really like him :)

lmfao . im such a softiee rite? -________-

around town

2009-08-03T21:50:00.000-07:00

hello everyone, back again - soon yes , i know.
whats up ^ i feel like im talking to myself latelyyyy:PPP
lmao oh well idk idc i'lll live .
I HAVE PICTURES ________^
oh & there was these cute boys onn the train; that started dancing on the train out of no wheree it was great =]

via bronx co-op city

2009-08-02T14:54:00.000-07:00

hello, again -
its weird how ive been posting so regularly but w'e .
people are reading attentively, though quietly.
& i like it... so guys im in NY.. Brox- co-op city to be exact .
its been fun & stuff idk ...i'm kinda missing providence, not really the scenery i miss the people. theyre what makes providence Providence.
right now i'm 'sposed to be making dinner, but i felt u rather blog than do that
- im going bowling later w my bestie's &tour guide oscar the octopus. LMFAO

one more time

2009-08-01T20:53:00.000-07:00

kay , so other day i went on a date w/ my husband gibran. I absolutely love spending time with him... its like Idk crazy :)
he can deffinately make me smile at anyy time of day. So on out date - we went to thayer st, & we walked around downtown , we ate some wings, idk it was nice :)
After that, we parted way's & i went out with my bestfriends , & the niggas i chill with daily now. (account of theyre our neighbors.. lol)
we went to the beach, we got one, then we chilled.. we almost beat on some weird lady on a bike .. she was asken for it Yoo i promise. lol sooo yeahh here it is.

muahhaha

2009-08-01T20:44:00.000-07:00

so we did this to nicki ...

omw

2009-07-30T16:47:00.000-07:00

im goen to NY tomorro mourning.
there will be pictures .

=]

a post with only words.

2009-07-25T12:44:00.000-07:00

everytime i post i only post pictures. i think its time for a word post.
i havent been really doen posts with much words in it because now r days my word doesn't really seem valid to anyone. But you know what ? i've gotten over it & i'm gunna do it anyways because i made the blog for me ; for the readers too- whom i love. everysingle one. literally.
but yeah idk whats up with me. i don't give a fuck about anythin . i wished i cared. lol
on friday i'm going to new york so i am happy.
& a check is coming into my name for a couplee . so i am pretty stoaked about that.

anyways , ive been spending all of my time with isa.stepha.lexis.liz & kinda nickii & cookie.

COOKIE IS A SNAKE BTW ! >:/

but yeah , so i haven't really been staying at my house. which is good , then kinda bad too because i love my mom. lol "/
& my bro's& sis's which they aren't really the reason but i'd feel bad not to mention them.

anyways, yea so this summer is pretty wack. haven't made moves really. & i failed a couple classes , but it's what ever. i mean it obviously isn't whatever but uh , september ill be sure to become a nerd like i was freshmen Yr.

let's take it all the wy back to hello.
th th th thhhatts all folks'

apologeee's

2009-07-25T12:30:00.001-07:00

to everyone, i been a lil busy doen absolutely nothing with my life.
anyways.

so steph & isa (the fem's w/ the baked ziti that I COOKED are my bestfriends)

& that whole jeni loves hector thing; wasn't me. it was nick . but i thought it was cute.

one last thing. the man getten head by the teddy = aaron.

i forgot how to smile =o

2009-07-13T12:45:00.000-07:00

hello,

2009-07-06T12:03:00.000-07:00

these are teddybears hector won :)

one more birthday post .

2009-06-21T14:35:00.000-07:00

thanks Berto Bear i love you .

i'd do anything for him cuz i know he'd move the world if he had to for me =D

lmao

2009-06-21T14:30:00.001-07:00

i love these people.
lmao at the two muscular cute guys UFC fighting in the grass with their shirts off at 1 in the mourning.

birthday girl .

2009-06-21T14:01:00.001-07:00

im finally 16 , loll .
i know i look like im a tad older.. but i'm not :)
hope fully when im Older people will think im younger? idk just a thought
My best friend(s) made my brithday all worth while .
thank's Berto & Melissa ;
& i like the whole spending time with george thingg (when don't i ?) =D

anyways.. berto took me to the fireworks 2 hrs; before my b day w. mike ; thaina; & meli .
Meli bought me a cake & everyone smuched it in my face :) lol

then Berto took me to the beach & thats where i blew out my candles.
everyone showed me more than enough loveee. <3
i felt good
in the morning i went to school .
it was also chelsea's bday .
(frankly im more important)
HBD chelsea though . lol
then i chilled with ginn, MAX & chris x3 (&melissa; but when am i not around her lol)
then george & kenny picked me up ^
(&edgar threw a party for me but i didn't even end up showing up ^ )
i went to the park & beach with my babee & kenny &melissa instead :)

this is how i feel

2009-06-10T19:29:00.000-07:00

... on wkend's lol, mostly the 1st one thooo .
(i am the girl standing up [well hypothetically speaking])

untitled.

2009-06-09T12:49:00.000-07:00

7 more days until my birthday . think of something nice to say to me :)

i have a reeeal bad feeling at the Pit of my stomachee.
it maybe a good feeling too , lol

wkend.

2009-06-07T20:43:00.000-07:00

this weekend was good =]
kinda stressing a couple things tho. but that can be put on hold .
HI JOEYYYY !

oh i pulled a johnnie , this weekend smh . lol i got a good drunk though it was aight 8-)
& the zoo was kinda sucky. no offense or anything it was a nice attempt lol

i chilled w. ryan though aha , he got so drunk it was crazy . he kept asking if i hated him & he kept callen me his bestie i was like aw =']

& melissa, smh she was Od sauced too . i love her so much , shes crazy .
if we don't have an insider for like everything in the world..

grindhouse is a goodmoviee. & i wanna watch Hangover.

another thing ; i sung alott this weekend , shad sayyys imma make a song w. him soon
im amped ^___________^

via classical high

2009-06-02T08:59:00.000-07:00

im typing from my school.
i got an 88 on my math test - highest grae ive gotten in her class all Yr.
(thanks to Nyquila)
the patriots came to my school yesterday? or someshit idk
i was entertained by the mascot .. & the cheerleaders =o

computer-math class is bullshit.
My birthday is in 14 days.
i want a car.
i want an iPhone
i want candy
A giant teddybear
Earings
Chancletas (preferably gladiators)
Alcohol
And Gr. :)

by the way i wish i was in new york sometimes on account of the people there are AWFULLY nice .

Pow Chicka Wahhhh . Aooooow -ch

thiss weekend.

2009-05-26T10:36:00.000-07:00

ohkieeee , well tis weekend was pretty ohkayy . lol
smh . i'm at stevens house right noww& him & gabie are probably doing the nasty downstairs lmao. lol theyre cute theyre always fighting but at the end of the day they always make up & cuddle & loook cute together its nice lol
Anyyyways so yeah on friday i chilled w. berttooo & alexis .
I got drunk -____-- ugh am disgusted in how fucking drunk i was...
My mind wasnt cooperating with my body . but itss w'e
I emded up getting like 3 bruises on my arms & like 5 cuts on my legs its ugly . Thank Alot Berto.
UGHHHH . lol i love berto idk why but i do . alot . Even though we fight like husband & wife aboutta get divorced lmao . Sometimess i wish he was like my big brother & other times i wish i could just push him off a bridge. BUt i know that if i push him off a bridge ill get all sad & cry alot alot alot cuz i wont be able to see him no more. Lmao I'd be the person to push him then feel bad & go all the way down at the bottom to catch him . Mhm , thasss that goood love =]

Anyways sso friday went bad . & stuff so i just waited on saturday .
Saturday was really terrific ^___^
righhhht first i was chillign w. berto & steven , & alex & melissa.
They was drinking blahblah having fun . then jamelia got berto tight so he wanted to take us home. Buut i didnt wanna go homee. so instead melissa texted kenny & we went with himm & geogre =D

(PAUSE)
I like george alot . Alot alot alot.
more than ive ever like any person in the whole wide world. I'd do anything for him . i swear i can be the best girllfriend ever to him i swwweeear . lol =']
Heee iss a guy. A good guy. whom i love =x more than my next breath . Its competely & utterly impossible to explain how much feelings i have for this Guy .
since For like ever too .
Omg hes a sweetheart to me too .. even though i dont get to see him as often as i'd like.
idc i'd give up even looking at every guy if i knew i could just be with him
He is like my first everythinggg.
& i'm glad he is because i invested alot of time into him . & idk hee just .. just carries my heart :P
but yeahhh continuingggggg...

So yeah we chilled till thhe next day =] it was nice.
Then he took me home on sunday & i went to work .
work was fun kinda . since we got a new manager. shes cool . i dont even remember her name but that is besides the poinnt. i got a shake thrown at me On sunday & i didnt even care. LMAO
booy oh boyy was i in a good mood!
Lmao after work jorge & melissa picked me up & we chilled then he dropped us off at sex's house.
Lol Sex sucked my eye o_O idk it was funny though .
& i got tickled attacked by aarun , lilHarlem. johnnie , & albert. (i am extremely ticklish)
ALbert fell asleep on my leg & i bagged him lmao it's gold =]

Onnn mondayyyyy i went to see my 'boy'friend marco . My birthday is our 'anniversary'
we went to see him on account of he is bad & was on house arrest . he got a weekend pass though which was alright =]
After seeing him we went to evans for a cookout & i just watched the guys play ball .

This weekend was kinda alright
Ohh yeahhh btw , i like Lia :-D

that right there says spiffy ^^^^^ :}

good , bad, then good again

2009-05-21T06:05:00.000-07:00

started off in a good moood..
thhen this guy & my gma . ugh
so it was bad ,
kept getting worsee
went to manton for reason ..
came back .
passed by eblens
seen my old buddy stephan !
me , him & stepha chatted
he thinks stephanie is Weird.
so do i :]
ate chicken .
straws were thrown in my boobs -___-
(stephanie)
straws were thrown up stephans nose ,
(stephanie)
my brother came
dropped stephan & stepha off
went shake hunting ..
mcdonalds hasnasty shakes.
then to sleeeeep

welll ...

2009-05-19T12:42:00.000-07:00

i have enough time now.
but i don't like to play catch up . either you was there or youll be there another time.

long nights & longer days. = jenifer rodriguez.

presto

2009-05-05T18:39:00.001-07:00

& here comes the magic.

Get it?

2009-05-05T18:36:00.000-07:00

i am fine where i stand now ;
less people = less worries , more time on what matters.
Get it?
i also dont get why you just dont love someone who already loves you - instead of chasing someone who you think you might like.

But if we all were with who we wanted to be with ; then no one would be with who they wanted to be with ?
Get it?

-___--

2009-05-02T15:06:00.000-07:00

every one fucking hates me , its getten on my nerves how many people dislike me .
& i dont even have my fucking phone.
OMFG
this stupid ass keyboard is all fucking wett from my teears.
w'eeee Yo .

Papi shampoo

2009-04-23T19:22:00.000-07:00

busy day today .
chilled w. long lost friend estphania bones :)
she's lovely .
I think imma take her out more often .
Mommie's birthday = saturday . Pa que lo sepa
Berto drives me insane , but i can't help but spend everyday w/him . Lmao
Papi shampooooooo papi papi shampoo ,
Hoookie
hookie
Hoookie
Hoookie
You remember how i said i loved loved loved my bestfriend kenny?
I do . But he doesn't feel the same way back .
-___-
I guess i needa start the endless search to replace the irreplacable ...
Waldo is nice , he said he isn't in it for the food (burgerking)
hes in it for me . Lol
that made me smileee
I notice i look fucking high in most of my pictures. Thats not cool on account of Im almost always completely sober .
Tomorrow im chilling with Ryan for the first time in dayssss.
this is nice eh :)
Pais is full of hick's
I love it.
Now , next time i will know not to steal M&M's because Berto doesn't like them (theyre my favourite .. )
I miss Shad & Josh where are they !?

throwing it out there

2009-04-20T19:41:00.000-07:00

If everything goes back to normal , then im going to fail my sophomore Yr.
I need love.
sometimes i wanna delete my blog.
If i were to make a twitter , it'd be uberly awesome but i know everyone is obsessed w. it so i don't.
I have recently learned to like my eyes.
Fake is everywhere.. :[
I have to be friends with one or the other, i can never be friends with both..
I think Youre a Fuck up .
I dont chill with anyone .
I did all my english homework Today
I wanna bitch slap Max in the face but i know he'll cry &ill feel like a jerk afterward , so i don't.
I wish everyone could understand me.
I think i falll in love with anyone who shows me the least bit of affection.
Too much affection is bad though.
Get tall .
I've given up .

Thats what i like to see ^

Gfredddd 8-)

2009-04-16T16:34:00.001-07:00

ily :-*
freddyyy is the sweetest hands down !

about me

2009-04-16T15:34:00.000-07:00

i really havent posted feeling & shit lately
So here goes myyy nigga !
Am lost .
i dont know what my problem is some days but i think i am goen crazy
I don't do anything correctly,
i am finding myself lying more frequently , being more emotional ,
Just idk , turning into something i've avoided my entire life.
I noticed i am spoiled .
I get what i want , how i want , when i want. No quesitons asked.
Everyone's been feeding into my habits as well.
If i say jump , you's dont say how high ,
Yous say when shall i come down :P
Not even kidding.
I been getting crazy head lately &imma end up expecting that shit from everyone.
My mother out of no where has been starting to care about me
This is some odd shit .
& ive been throwing kiddy tantrums like a bitch .
I wanna change, but sayen i need change isnt actually going to change Anything.
Am just throwing quick thoughts out so don't think too much into thiss...
I miss ryan , I been slacking not chilling with him lately .
I feel like i dont have any best friends anymore.
I cant chill w. issa no more , & gabie idk whats going on with her.
Theyre perfectly fine w/out me i think i should be fine w/out them too.
On the other hand i hhave shad&josh around alot, i feel like i can count on them for anything .
I have less & less female friends as the days go by .
I wanna bee bestfriends with janelle again , Idk i miss her sometimes. lol
I Love shad & josh more than anything now or days.
Kenny's been slacking , But hes taking me laser tagging tonight to make up for eveyrthing he's missed.
I am planning to re-arrange my shit around .

I love my big brother alot , & i take him for granted but If he wasnt here, i dont think i would be neither.

Notice how i dont love any females ?
theyre snakes , all except me of course .
Only cuz i get treated like a dude, & i rather have it that way anywaysss.

so far

2009-04-16T15:05:00.000-07:00

this calls for a picture post.

rap battle

2009-04-12T11:12:00.000-07:00

HIYA !
Idk if You's noticed or not , but I've stopped maken ugly , sad posts.
Even though that is bad for the typical , nosey , reader.. It is great for me
It is showen you That i too can get over anything .. :)
I hadn't chilled w/Shad innnn daysss . & now that i finally did am like super excited
I been chilling w/Angely lately too ,
on account of i have like no other female friends , Theyre alll flamers & stunner'ss . =__=
How's your vacation guys?
Mine is going on Swell b___^
On friday , i chilled w/ Shad & Freddy
We went to go visit Rita at her job since it was her Birthhhdayyyyy
(happpyyy birthhdayy Ritaaa bbyygurrrrrl)
Then we left ,
When we left , we picked up Angely & we went to freddy's
it was cool , we juss' chilled .
& everyonee was feeining on their Sk camera's Lmao:

On saturday (yesterday night)

Uhhhm i worked & stuff , then i bought Shad somee food from my job.

Lol He took so long though i am sure the food was Cold. Lol

I likedd seeing him all excited that i brought himm food i was cuteee Lol

Righhhht , so Everyone starteddd rappenn .

Omg it had to be the funniest shit ever.There ws this kid , Idk his name . He had a red nike sweater, & aqua blue force1's

& Heee wass rappennn out his ass.

Everything he said was completely irrelevant to the line before & like none of it rhymed

But idk it wass juss the funnniest ever big ups to him ^

Lmao Then some girl started rappennn she was hardbody !

Lol , she got this kid so mad that he went home .

LMAO LMAO LMAO LMAO

Anyways i gotta go to work , so goodbyeeee <3>

Oh yeah , There wass these two ,

that were Amped that they could make Pb & J sandwiches :)

quick note

2009-04-11T09:59:00.000-07:00

1. i know , you showed me that song , Lol
2. He didn't , But you can
3. I miss you more

lot'ss of new blogss poppenn out ?
Btw , i got a new sk :)

HappyBirthday Shadsicle Kaydea

2009-04-07T17:17:00.000-07:00

This post , especially made for you since i know youre an avid reader
& are very attentive w/my blogs :]
& because since i love youuuu muchooo .

& i wish we could have spent today together , & been OG tripple OG gangster like always ;)
But tomorrow is dedicated to yu too , says jenifer :)

faux

2009-04-06T19:03:00.000-07:00

it's not what it looks like :)

i haven't posted in a while .
I miss shad & Josh - alottt
Jenifer still doesn't have a phone

am getten boring .
Goodnight .
Oh , i think albert is cute =D

Lost

2009-04-03T11:32:00.001-07:00

at this moment in time right now i feel like i threw everything i worked for ,
Away . . .
& the one person who know's is more dissapointed in me than i am in myself.

but still

Hi , BLACKSHEEEEEEEEEEEP

i guess i can deserve to smile someetimes ?

Alberto Gomez

2009-04-01T21:19:00.001-07:00

Today was a rather odd day . well i think
I didn't chill w/ shad & Josh like usual ..
Today i decided to chill w/ Steven , Gabie , & Berto
They was givinnn Gabie lessons today
& Idk what , but something happened.
It made me mad ,
I freaking got a bruise on my leg from chasing Berto .
I felt stupid , retarded , & like i betrayed a good friend.
I was embarrassed.
But it wasn't my fault this time
I got so mad .. :P
but i was just quiet , i didn't say nuthing .
I always stay quiet . They hate it more than me talking .
w'e
Stevens cousin started giving Birth .
steven , & gabie get dropped off.
Now we're alone w/ a Berto & an Angry Jenifer.
OMG I LOVE BERTO NOW :]

i was such a bitch i feel bad now for making him suffer like he did today ,
wasted like 378473892 dollars on gas tryna please me ,
dancing like a damned fool for me
almost crashing for me,
then even goen to like 7829 restaurnts to buy me food.
I was such a stubborn Bitch
i deserved for him to leave me stranded.
But he didn't
I LOVE HIM
Any other nigga wouldaa drovee off on my asss
Bt he didn't
DID I MENTION HOW MUCH I LOVE BERTICO?
<3333333333333333333333333333333333

'she's down w/the Block'

2009-03-31T21:03:00.000-07:00

i swear these days only two people can make me smileee.
everything one else just seems to go in one ear & out the other.
Today = day 3 w/Shadsicle & JOSHH :]
It was cool , they bought me eggrollsss 8-)
(Btw, Josh & Shad are the two people i mentioned in my first sentence^^)

Todayyy i wass actually on a track !
Lmao , i didnt sing or anything , i just promoted my blog ^__^
Jeison recorded his part so many times i think i memorized his verse ,smh
I wore cargo shortsss today , it was cool

Today was a pretty mellow day after 4 pm ..
well until i got back home to AIM . ____-
I wish all my days were mellow . smh
Shad & Josh swear i have a temper problem that i try 'hiding' .
lmao i don't see it ,

I keep singinggg more & more these days , maybe i will one day get enough balls to friggginn record on an actual track :P

P.S The Banana Game has gone Global :]

F#%$ing B*$%#

2009-03-31T12:14:00.001-07:00

i got suspended today for looking for MY phone ,
because some one stole it .
The refferal said :
i was late , i was listening to music , & that i was Texting .
I CAME LATE BECAUSE I WAS LOOKING FOR THE FUCKING PHONE YOU CLAIM I WAS TEXTING ON .
omfggg .
i was listening to WHAT MUSIC??
WHAT MUSIC DEVICE??
Oh the one That Gabriela Lost ??
OH THAT ONE ??
Because i found it in spanish class?
Because ionly use it in spanish class then it gets lost again ??
ARE YOU STUPID?
wtf i cant fucking stand classical.

& i get home to my mom almost rippinn my fucking lip ring out .
& when my grandmother from fucking hell starts talken shit to me & my mother about how there is a million reasons why im dumb, & retarded, & how i will get no where in life because im such a fucking Burden to everyone ,
i stick up for my mom because - i am the one who she should be yelling at
& My Mom DEFENDS HER
OMFG .
SO I AM GUESSING I AM INDEED THE BURDEN IN EVERYONE'S LIFE.
& i intend to remove myself from everyones life.

FUCKING PEICE OF SHIT ASS LIFE THAT I HAVE RIGHT.
EJQHVRL,OCNGLJRNKOEFLKNT;JBRV LJVM;KFNDGJLTCMRDJE4VHG,RDV
i dont know what to write anymore.

checkers on a chess board

2009-03-30T20:23:00.000-07:00

Today wass Mucho Fun , it was another day well spent w/SHADSICLE & company lol .
well first i spent it w/Angely & gabie then i went to Chill w/ the Others.
I went to Thayer street today , where we Had Shaghai's (MMM, i highly recommend!)
I also went to spectrum India & bought a Gemini bracelet , & this bag made from my country , it is a bag of TINY TINY dolls , yu say one worry to each doll every night , & it is said that they take your worries away , one night at a time..
I thought it was pretty cool , so i took one since i am full of worriesss :P

I was 'sposed to chill w/ Ryan today but idk i couldn't so i ended up chilling w/ shad, josh, Fred, Angely , & Aleidy instead.
We went to Fred's house , who I btw think is like Od Cute ")
yeah , where shad beat Fred 2x at checkers on a Chess board.
Then i watched the Mexican , while Shad did his Music thing & made a beat outta No where o_O
After that , We went downstairs to where i taught them part 1 of how to dance to spanish musiccc.
LMAO LMAO LMAO i wish i couldaa recordedd it

PAY ATTENTION HOW SHAD IS RESTING ON JOSH'S SHOULDER :)

Vocalss

2009-03-29T21:17:00.000-07:00

TODAY I CHILLED w/ SHADSICLE <3
& jeison , & josh , & Odell ?
lol , there was one other , but I didn't even ask him his name i dont think.
w'e w'e , theyre cool though 8-)
Right so i am AMPED !
wanna know why ?
ask why ?
OHK ILL TELL YU WHY !
so shad is recordinnn "last Laugh" righht , & out of no where He puts My blog in itt !
WOOhoo yu can imagine how my face lit up
i was gunna sing in the chorus but i was wayyyy too scared & embarrased..
Idk why . loll
Yoo right , that is like the first time i met themmm , & i was by myself & i wasn't even shy (except for the singing part)
That'ss how yu can tell i will like to chill w/them more often :)
but yeah , im still Shad'ss Managerr 8-)
the song in the video = song he recorded :

GG<3

2009-03-26T19:40:00.000-07:00

Long time no post
kay so i've been thinking right , &idk. lol
what i do know is that i am goen to try not to be so depressed that my friends are dyen .
Doesn't that sound weird?
Like how we can live in a community where i can say " I wish He dies instead" & it is alright?
I just think that that is some HardCore shit. -___---
Ah well this won't be a gloomy post seeing that everyone thinks i am Going to go emo & crawl under a rock . I can assure everyone , I'm fine , i don't need the rock . I think i would rather talk to Gibran instead anyways.
The other day , Gibran made a post about me. It madeee me feeel like extra extra special.
It wasn't like a i love jenifer shes cool wooHOO kinda post.
It was more like a IDK , actual reasons why he Loved me.lol
Welll i think that Gibran Gonzalez , happens to be one of the most wonderful people i have ever met. & one of the most influential as well. Maybe it is the way he talks to me or what but he can make me melt ")
He is known as my husband , But he might as well be called my counselor , lol I think he has helped me so much through these past days i have been an absolute wreck.& the thing is , is like He isnt scared to love me .. Well if he is , he sure can hide it pretty darn well. Lol , i think he can make the sun shine just a little brighter , & make everything smell so much better.....Who know's .
He has taught me more than i could ever fathom.
Geeee, i am glad to havee foundd him.Now that i am done givennn gibrannn like mad head over bloggggage . lmao i will go on,
I am a bit happier these days , Idk .i spend every single day with Ryan . lol , I have no clue why i haven't got tired of him yet .Even if he falls asleep when there is company over . smh But yeah , Lately , ive been looking through all my Little journals & diaries, & friendshipbooks all this extra crap & i have always liked the same perrsonnnn my nigga !
I think that is soooo ODD.

Am i a bad Influence?
I have been told that all week by adults & it is really starting to get aggravatinng. UGHHH Even though i am usually the prudent one & i am always the 1st to suggest we head home. Ahhhh welll , if these parents saw how these kids acted while they weren't there !!!!
Anywho , I have a bunch of clothes & stuff , like laying on my bed - & there is a book calling my name so i will get back to you on how the rest of my life goes in a short while :]For Your looking pleasure:

RIP JONATHAN REYES

2009-03-20T19:33:00.000-07:00

More misery , more tears , Another death .
So far this one is hurting me the most.
I think i am going to go insane pretty soon .
If i haven't already .
I Loved your life , It shouldn't have been tooken .
You should've been strong. Im sorry for blaming you ..
I should've consulted you . But i couldn't had done it alone..
I miss you . I miss you the most.
God bless your mother , she raised a beaustiful person .
My mom cried over you .. She know's you didn't deserve this happen to you .
Just as much as i did.
I can't stop crying . It just won't stop
I miss your eyes , & your soft voice - you were always so charismatic but stayed so calm at the same time. It was like , perfection.
it wasn't your time to go . I wasn't ready to let you leave.
Idk man , Providence is just getting out of hand.
RIP Jonathan March 20, 2009 .

crumpled up notebook paper

2009-03-17T19:47:00.000-07:00

this started as a note to gabie , i am copying as is mistakes & all:
I havent wrote a note in a long time but . w'e .
Ugh kid i feel like im abitch because i cant handle the shit that goes on in my life anymore. I cry over everything. Yo like nothing i do is ever right. I keep remembering one night i was with steven in a hartford party. That day Angel got jumped.
It's weird how emotions work ; Because i didn't help him. i say i couldn't have but i probably could have. Cuz i know when i saw steven almost get hit i jumped in the way & when issa was getting hit by her mom , i tried blocking the hits. & I know if george or my older brother was to ever almost get hit ..i'd jump right into the middle.
Idk. sometimes i feel like im too weak for the lifestyle that has been given to me. & everyone around me is weak too. I feel like i always have to be the strong one so i never talk about my problems & i just listen & consult everyone like my life is all good.
I wish i could leave providence. But then i'd feel guilty for running away from my problems -____-.
I swear i've been through it all. & i never say anything Because if i do , i am "exaggerating". IDK why my mind works this way but is does..
& everytime i think of a bad thing , they all come out. All the bad i ever been through - it joins together & over powers me , it outweighs what i can handle.
I cant handle everything. I'm sorry but
im not super woman.
I keep imagining me cleaning off Angels blood that night . HE was too weak to even speak. Everytime i would look up at him my throat tightened & my eyes welled up. I think now at it * he's made me Love him. Ive grown so much with him. I hope someone tries to fight him soon. I will jump in the middle of it.

IS IT ME OR DOES EVERYONE FEEL LIKE THIS AT TIMES o_O

The night angel got hurt , Shanelle called me the strongest person she knew.
I love you Shanelle A young.

.

2009-03-14T15:18:00.000-07:00

my mom isn't letting me go anywhere .
last night i snuck out to play rock bannd at gabiee'ss
she hasn't said anything yet .

I first went to edgar'sss bar though , i loveee tht nigga OD .
151 & grey goose.
THAT SHIT MAKES YOUR TONGUE NUMB.

Oh , & sorry "/

one more thing .
I made a rap for Shad , even though i suck . I d k it was upon his request :
shad ain't bad , shad is rad
he's like the dad i never had ,
he'ss calm & collective but if you get him mad
he will stomp ya ass out
Congress ave is what he shoutss
niggas never get it twisted
or he'll show you what he's bouut .
Thats my nigga till the end ,
He's more special than a friend ,
I'm his piglet - he's my shad
He's the best i ever had .

Thats what i can come up with in 7 minutesss -____--- loll
g'byeee.

crying.

2009-03-09T21:03:00.001-07:00

all dy today i have been crying. This is like 4 days in a row the tears just won't stop,
Today i got called down to the office, but not for my regular cut slip & detention write ups. This was mental help. I needed some. Everyone does sometimes nah?
I see the whole office different now.
I love the office & all the counselors , teachers & principals in it.
Especially Mrs.Battey , she is a soldier. My biggest reguards to her . She is super woman , & she is a role model .
I spent my day venting& crying w. one of my bestfriends, Gabie.
Around 12:00 pm, i came to the conclusion that Classical was just not right for me.
Tomorrow is my last day of school at classical , then i am off to Pais High School.
I went home , & chilled . then went out w. Ryan .

After a while , i got annoyed of everyone pretending to care that i was leaving.
Then George hit me up. Shit if everything is this world wasn't already upside down.
& I am so glad he did , because if he didn't I'd be sleeping with the earth on my shoulderrs.
I fucked up alot. & i am more than willing to change , everyone loved the old me so much more. Especially him. & i cant remember life without him, i think i did have good days?

Oh shit &when we stopped talken i got an email from Alex. That made me start crying again thinking about all the good things i have in this life. I thought about how maybe my whole life wasn't a total shit hole after all.
Fuck i cry alot.

I would like to thank :
Ryan , he is there for me for everything , since the day i met him.
Alex , only male i am not attracted to that can make me cry.
Shanelle , whom thinks exactly like i do.
Gabie , my best friend.
Gelissa , my best friend.
Kenny , more than a bestfriend . But like a diary , a brother , & a bodyguard wrapped in one .
Gibran , i can never be more comfortable around someone i am so attracted to.
Mrs. Battey , fucking soldier.
Jenelia , she tries so hard to make my day better it is impossible not to completely love her.

& George ,for whom without him - i Dont think i could live life correctly.

uhm idk

2009-03-08T18:24:00.000-07:00

uhh k , how do i start this..
Rest In Paradise , J
this was my weekend:
workk -
party-
hospital-
police stattion-
cry-
cry-
cry-
work-
cry-
cry-
cry-
sleep-
work-
cry.

any questions?

i wouldaa done this word for word on what happened , but now that i am finally happy i don't want to ruin it.
& i think i am very occupied with gibran.
He is my husband , forever & always :]

summary

2009-03-02T21:12:00.000-08:00

HIYA FOLKS.
i am sorry for not posting for such a long time , i d k i just haven't been in the mood i am guessing.
This weekend was fun for me i think .
I spent the whole weekend with Issa& Ryan . They happen to be in my favorites list, as well as a few others.
On friday , i went to Ryan'ss house . I got mad while i was there so i was really really quiet. That shit was wack .
On saturday , i went to Jesenia'ss sweet16 . It lacked an audienceee . More people should have came , but i am not complaining , she gave me a reason to look cute in a hotel . Lol
It was fun , i danced a whole lot=]

i danced with RYAN ! =O
he is always so scared to dance around me it is ridiculous. lmao he knows how to dance :]
Anyways , after the party , i slept at issa's house.
On Sunday , I had alot of fun . Me& issa were just driving around in her gma's hoopty [lmao]
& we decided to pick up ryan . We went to my house to pick up some shit first righhht , then we went to the park.
& since it was snowing , we decided to play in the snow!
It was the most fun i had in like yeears. Lmao . ISSA FELL DOWN THE HILL ! it was completely hilarious ohmg.
Me & Ryan rolled down the hill & i ended up scraping my knee ='[
lmao then we raced to the car & ryan fell running up the stairs !
I swear 5 yr oldsss be having jump off's at parks
So yeah On monday , i did nuthing . Lmao
i visited my bestfriend & jordan , & we listened to music & chilleddd , i swear i am so nice i did kenny's dirty laundry at the laundry mat & i walked back with it on my back in the snow ='[
SMH , that unappreciative bastard . lmao nosa =)

anyways yeah , that was my little weekend summary , enjoy.

Sunday night

2009-02-24T18:30:00.000-08:00

this is what happened on sunday night :

who's ass is that ?

>=]

Shadsicle.

2009-02-23T22:34:00.000-08:00

Shad is a beast . idgaf what you say.
If Shad isn't a beast , then you are Not Human.

For the people who Strive* to be different don't take that Not human thing as a compliment.

I met him over myspace or aim idk which one to pick . He is nice 8-) he is sweet , honest , caring , & his lyrics shows so.
LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN & cmnt .

anyways i have spent my night talking to Shad , he calls me piglet -___-- because of him , i snort now.

[01:10] shadd: bloggage an free spanish lessons?
[01:10] shadd: if you can cook
[01:10] shadd: i might just kidnap you an put you in a cage
[01:10] shadd: lmfao
[01:10] imcooel88: then how will i make yu breakfast
[01:11] imcooel88: smh
[01:11] shadd: you will have a kitchen in there
[01:11] shadd: an send me food thru the slot
[01:11] imcooel88: =O
[01:11] shadd: nosa
[01:11] shadd: lmao
[01:11] imcooel88: i will refuse
[01:11] imcooel88: to cook
[01:11] imcooel88: i dont know how to cook , just for that cmnt
[01:11] imcooel88: & i will prepare giant ass 3 course meals
[01:11] imcooel88: for me , my self & my cage
[01:11] imcooel88: >=P

DUDE , its 1:11 am Make a Wish please.

tagg

2009-02-22T19:01:00.001-08:00

i have been tagged by Christine my sugar , & shanelle my Brain.
i am only doing this once though so Here:
1. I am 100% guatemalan.
2. I work at Burgerking.
3. I have a car fetish
4. I hate McDonalds if every MickeyDee's were to burn down right now I'd be happy tp build Wendy's to take their place . [ Or maybe PIZZA QUEEN's] lol
5. I have never Had a Real boyfriend. or a valentine Lmao
6. My first kiss of O9 was by a girl :]
7. I always wanted , & still do want to become a singer.
8. I cry at movies
9. I have liked the same boy since I was 11 yrs of age.
10. I am scared to ask people for favors.
11. I meet people from Myspace
12. My middle name is PAOLA.
13. I consider Gelissa Batista more of my family than my blood.
14. I like the color green , not neon green -____-- that is ugly.
15. I have yet to fill out my income tax
16. I am laying on clean clothes right now

i hope that was good enough
oh btw, i tagged dyslexic minds& leaving notes/getting ghost

I am sick of

2009-02-21T14:37:00.000-08:00

hello. I was upset yesterday because people led me to believe i had a reason to be.
Me&her cleared that up &we're cool.
I am sick of people using me for entertainment. Like is my life really that interesting?

Should my post's really be conversation starters & the main Topic of peoples conversations ?

You guys are giving me wayy too much credit for this shit.
I am doing me , I never knew this shit was so interesting.

I am sick of fucking beef. I m sick of blogs making people dislike eachother. I am sick of Losing respect. I am sick of Losing love . I am sick of waiting for shit that probably wont even happen.
I am sick Of instigators. I am sick of school , teachers, & every one who is a student at classical highschool. I am sick of not being too pretty enough or too this or too that .
I am sick of not having who i cant in my fucking arms. I am sick of caring so much .
There is so much more i need ot make a FUCKING LIST

WHAT I AM SICK OF:
bullshit
you
bullshit
fighting
fighting over bullshit
Guys
Bitches [FEMALEs]
bullshit
Lies [bullshit ]
people telling me what to do as if my fucking brain doesn't work
People not caring.
People caring too much
Cars beeping at me
Being a pedestrian
working at BK
Living in this house.
Humans.

i will add shit later maybe, but for now , Goodbye